So there I was, in a bathroom of a bar. It's one of those bathrooms with
attendents.
[ You find that there are attendents/servers/general-sycophants
everywhere in China... cheap labor, you know? Every stupid restaurant/bar/salon/whatever
has a pair of young girls opening doors for you. And the ratio of servers
to customers is usually 2:1. Or at least that's what it seemed like. ]
Anyway, just when I started to pee at the urinal, the attendent came behind me and
greeted me. I was thinking how inappropriate that was since I was in the middle of
peeing, but hey! it's China, maybe pee-time isn't off-limits. So I started to answer him. Big mistake.
As soon as I opened my mouth to say "I'm okay" he shoved a piece of gum in my mouth. "Enjoy
some refreshing gum, sir!" he cheerfully said.
While I was peeing! Okay, even as my mind was reeling from this unprecedented turn of event
HE STARTED TO MASSAGE MY BACK!! While I was still peeing! Massage my back! Peeing! Massage! WTF!
Needless to say, for the rest of my time in China, I kept my mouth shut and shook
my head vigorously to signal my not needing a massage everytime I entered a bathroom
with attendents.